Lie

Is it a lie that I live
Lie that I say
Talk about
Feel
Understand
The longing still there
And getting replaced
The memory of you, strong
And getting faded away
The pain of losing you
And butterflies of love
The emptiness of loss
And the gain of belongingness
The belief of once-in-a-lifetime
And expectations of future
Lie, is it all I lie
Is this world a lie

Longing

You ask me
The progress I made in life
Progress away from you
If I have found any meaning
To my life
And I wonder what should I say
I have progressed even since I met you
And my life found it's meaning
Never to feel lost again
Never to feel alone again
Never to find myself needing
Never to find myself longing..

Nothingness

Miserable
And reason for others misery
Always walked on the paths
I wanted to
Without thinking about consequences
About my own self
Or for the other one
I'm just a dust particle
From the bottom of earth
And you're an angel
Too far away from my reach
I can sometimes fly
Involuntary, with the wind
Hoping to reach you
Touch you
Have a better glimpse of you
From proximity
Miserable
And reason for others misery
Wish to fly away
Either to be one with you
Or with nothingness!

Dare to dare

I will not call you
From your cave
For I do not have the right
I can sit here with my pen and paper
And my muses and raves

I will not pull you
From deepest of your world
I will let you sink deeper
And will call for you without being heard

I will not wish you
Leave everything for me
To not put you in the shackles of my love
And stop you from being free

I will only wait for you
To get back here
You don't challenge my patience
You don't dare to dare!

Right and Just

So used to you
And your love
Time spent without you
Feels so empty
Your insisting on continuing the conversion
And short listing the topics of further discussion
And then never discussing them again
The first call in the morning
And listening to your voice
You insisting on my safety
And being around me all the time
Still asking me if I'm okay with it
Asking if together our worlds rhyme
Of you bringing some random topics
To keep the conversion going
And telling what I assume to be
Isn't and will not be true
Questioning me of my wisdom
And generalisation about love
And telling me you will prove me wrong
For everything that is right
For making the plans of future
And projecting it with me
In the campuses, schools and jungles
We will keep our promises
In the world where I decided never to adjust
You make it sound so easy
And every action of past
Right and just!

My world!

All the songs that started making sense

Now suddenly don't make sense

The things which felt right

Are again wrong and part of some Utopian world

I had some believes

And I was happy with my life

Then you came and changed the outlook

and I started believing in some new world

Now you aren't around

and things are back to they were

And what do I do now?

How do I go back to dystopian world?

Help me go back to normal

Do something which makes me hate you

Now I can't take it anymore

I need to believe it wasn't true!

Mist

Another world

Another realm

When I think about that time

I see a dream

It was something out of the world

It was unbelievable

It was the world of skies and flights

It was the world of wishes and mights

It wasn't part of this earth

I wasn't here anymore

I am sure now that angels exist

Which made me look through water and mists

Brain and heart

I wish love was easy

Just like other things

You can choose and control you feelings

and choose which bells should ring

I wish I had control

To forget and love more

I wish I could change my emotions

and show the older ones door

I wish to be stronger 

but I end up giving up

I wish to make a new start

and align my brain and heart

I hate...?

I hate that I love you this much
I hate that I need you all the time
I hate that even when I want to move on
My heart is here and then again it's gone

I hate that I wanted such love
I hate that I cannot have it anymore
I hate that you pretend not to understand
I hate that I still am in some dreamland

I hate I found that love in you
I hate that I felt what real love is
I wish I didn't know I have that capacity
I didn't know I can make someone my deity

I hate that I can't love anyone again
Knowing what is love
I hate that I can't change your mind
I hate that, to others I am so blind

I hate that my love for you doesn't change a bit
I hate that I still dream about you
I hate this because I am tired of all this
I hate because I don't even have the right to miss!

क्या है क्या नहीं

कुछ सपने जो साकार हुए
कुछ जो नहीं हुए
क्या किसी की ख़ुशी
और किसी का मलाल है?
क्या बीते कल की यादें
और आने वाले कल के सपने भी हैं?
क्या जो पूरा ना हो सका
उसके पीछे भागने
और उसे पाने का जज़्बा है
या कुछ नया पाने और कर दिखाने
का जूनून?
क्या है और क्या नहीं
चाहत है भी और नहीं
मलाल है भी और नहीं
पर यादें हैं
सपने हैं
जूनून है
और जज़्बा है।